Ask Him Where The Other Part Of His Thumb Is.

You have nothing to complain about sitting in a middle seat on a Southwest flight to Denver when the guy next to you is going to Denver to get his thumb sewn back on. That is a tenant of air travel. You cannot complain when you ask him where the other part of his thumb is and he says none of your business and then he tells the flight attendant his thumb is in Denver. You cannot complain that that doesn't make sense. You cannot complain when he keeps adjusting his wig and bumps you in the head with his elbow. And you especially cannot complain when it smells like he took a dump in his pants. Not a fart, but the smell of actual fecal material, because you would shit your pants too if you had to wait an hour and fifty two minutes to get your thumb sewn back on.